Not MY job!

I have a wife, a housekeeper and a nanny so why am I working my butt off in this huge house? My wife had moved out but is currently moving back in. There are boxes everywhere and girly things I never knew what to do with in the first place. It seems the boxes multiply. I suspect she unpacks things from one box and puts them in another because she can't decide herself where they should go or because she thinks it's easier for me to carry 1,000 boxes than 100.

She is afraid to go to the attic. It's dark up there and there might be spiders, and isn't that the man's job.... going into attics, killing spiders, moving innumerable boxes? :) So the boxes-to-go-into-the-attic line is growing and growing. No, I'm not afraid of going into the attic myself. That's what extra large flash lights are for and why I sent the exterminator guy up there to replace all light bulbs a long time ago.

We all are supposed to 'pick up' for ourselves. It's not fair that the wife has to clean after everyone, and I hate hearing the 'that's not fair' line. The kids do a pretty good job, probably because I can carry out my spanking threats to them. The housekeeper does OK most of the time. After all, she is the housekeeper. However, she refuses to pick up after the nanny. She figures the nanny is just an employee like she is and can pick up after herself and the kids. That's what she gets paid for, right? I do not know how much I pay the housekeeper for figuring out what clothes belong to whom, who left that tea cup unwashed, who spilled crumbs on the floor and who is drinking straight out of the milk carton. She mumbles endlessly, 'who didn't wash the spoon' or some such thing. I probably pay as much for the mumbling as I pay her for what she actually does. I continue to pay though. Good help is hard to find.

The nanny speaks very little English. This was by design for I wish my kids to continue to be bilingual, at least. Actually, they speak English, Spanish and Portuguese. The nanny speaks Guatemalian Spanish as in ghetto spanish. I alone seem to totally understand her, but I'm at work a lot of the time, and there is no interpreter except for me. This leaves her with the wife, the housekeeper and the kids much of the time. If she does not want to 'pick up,' she doesn't and none of them understand her when she says 'not my job' or 'Dr. M. doesn't pay me enough to do that,' whatever. The kids not only speak great Spanish, but they have learned many new Spanish phrases for 'I don't know,' 'don't care,' or 'it will never happen in this life time.'

Last, but definitely not least, we have five dogs. Everyone knows it's the man's job to take care of the dogs' outside needs. But inside? Who lets them in anyway? How difficult is it to get the dog groomer and brush them before they sleep on my favorite chair? Oh, I forgot. 'Not MY job.'

It's a good thing I'm the man of the house and take care of things.