The agony of regret...

Regret is the sorrow or mourning over something that can NOT be repaired... too late to fix it, no way to mend it. What do you do with regret?

I counsel people all the time who say 'I wish,' 'I should have,' 'Why didn't I?' They made errors in judgement or errors in behavior that wounded another and they cannot make it 'right' again. Many of these were 'crimes' of passion. To hold someone's heart in your hands and then to betray that trust is a horrible thing, broken trust that often cannot be mended, depending on the extent of the betrayal. So what to do? Just forget and move on?

Not so easy to do if one has a conscience. There is, wrote Paul, a "worldly sorrow" that "brings death." A guilt that kills. A sorrow that's fatal. A venomous regret that's deadly. Some things cannot be forgotten. They must be dealt with.

To deal with regret, you need to to determine your guilt, where you went wrong. This is after you have determined there is nothing you can do to 'fix' things. After you determine the extent of your guilt, you need to repent. That means not just being sorry but changing your ways, with the help and grace of God.

Regardless of our pasts, we can again rejoice in God's grace but after repentence and whatever amends we can make. Of course, the best thing when possible is not to cause regret. Be honest in your dealings with others. Do not deceive, do not lie with a smile on your lips. Do not cheat your brother by robbing him of his money or his property or by breaking his heart. Hearts can be broken literally and figuratively. I will leave it to you to determine which hurts the most.

Are you suffering from regret? Choose today what you will do about it.